I am terrified for the year of the tiger. I am so afraid. I don't want to do bad. I am so scared that I am going to 'fail' again. Which I suppose isn't a very good/healthy mentality. I don't want to disappoint others or myself more. I feel like I lowered peoples expectation of me (which sounds a little dumb, because I'm not sure if people care that much). I guess it doesn't really matter what other people think of me. But still don't want people to think that I can't do it. I don't want ME to think that I can't do it.
On the flip side, I'm quite determined to do well. This is probably because of how scared I am, but it doesn't really matter. A little over a week ago, Shira and I went through all the requirements together and planned out a new (and better, in my opinion) schedule. I've been getting back into the routine, and it's been going relatively well. It makes me excited.
My personal requirements this year are mostly to keep my aware of what I'm doing. I think (hope) that they'll keep me on track. I will definitely be blogging more. Way more. I felt really bad about how I blogged in the last year. I still do feel bad, but now I more determined. I can't really change the past. I can only change what I'm going to do next.
